But seriously, if you were smart 2,000 years ago, you probably had something to do with religion (that was the only place they taught anything and where the first universities began). So I figure there’s gotta be somethin’ smart up in there.
Jesus. A very nice dude. In all honesty, I think he was the most understanding man to have lived. He just really loved, understood, and accepted people while wanting the best for them. If you read only his words, it paints an extremely different picture than the rest.
If you want the quick version, you can get 90% of the way by just reading Genesis and Exodus, Matthew, Mark, and Luke (John gets a touch long winded and preachy). Those last three are the new testament and have all of Jesus’s actual words. If you want to have fun, read Revelations. Yikes. The old testament has a lot of… well genealogy and God being mad at various groups of people, telling them to do something, them not doing it, and then him being mad again. Most of the other books in the new testament are letters from Paul or other apostles and they’re pretty preachy. Most of the good solid content is contained in the books I outlined above.
Now onto the Quran.